There is a special sound that is made when a wrapper is removed from a piece of chocolate that only someone less than the age of ten can hear. How they acquire this skill I'll never know. Such was the circumstances that I found myself in a couple of days ago.
I looked around and made sure that the coast was clear when I snuck a bite-sized Snickers bar from my wife's secret stash. Just as I was unwrapping this little treat, I looked up to see my five year old staring at me from across the room.
"I'm going to tell mom," he said with a little air of authority. I said, "Now you wouldn't want to tattle on dad, would you?" I could see that there was no backing down, so I went to plan B: "Hey, how about having one with me?" I blurted out in desperation. After a short pause he conceded and said, "Okay." So then I got another and tossed it to him.
That is where I got cocky. Trying to make sure that I had all of my bases covered I added the comment, "So now you can't tell mommy on me because you're having one too." Well, he wouldn't have anything to do with that type of extortion so he hucked the candy bar back at me.
At this point, I knew my goose was cooked, so I suppressed all my guilt and ate my candy bar anyway bracing myself for the inevitable outcome. Sure enough, the little spanker ratted me out. I could see the pleasure in his eyes as he gave the full account to mommy. It's that same look mommy got when she knew that she could get after daddy for taking the candy. They must be related.
My kids are much better at being an adult than I am.
Wow - he gave up candy for the privilege of telling on you huh? jenny must be pretty feisty to make it worth his while. i think it really just goes back to yours and his competition for jenny's love. andrew - 1, rex - 0.
ReplyDeleteMore like Andrew - 1,000,000 , rex -0.00000000
ReplyDeleteThat is too funny, you are never going to get ahead with loyalty like that!
ReplyDeleteYesterday I told Andrew I'd meet him in the car and that we'd get there at the same time. I was quite late and when I got in he said, "We need to have a little talk..."
ReplyDeleteAndrew says:
ReplyDeleteI told Daddy he shouldn't be eating the candy because I will tell. Because it isn't good to steal. But I think he's still happy. Of course he is.
And I'm a little silly too for myself. But when I tossed the candy back over I was a little bit scared, but I will still live with it.
Bye bye.
That...is...hilarious!! My kids would totally have eaten it and blackmailed me by asking for more to keep quiet!
ReplyDeleteToo funny! Unfortunately, Ryan has never been intimidated by "getting in trouble" when he eats an entire bag of chocolate chips I've been keeping in the freezer for the occasional batch of cookies. Can you give him lessons?
ReplyDelete